As a youngster, after school, a bunch of us would go up to the park to play basketball, football, or whatever sport was in vogue, for that seasonal time. As I moved into my teens, the emphasis was not so much on sports, but rather which girls were watching, when we played sports. I was gradually being introduced to the world of peer pressure, of not being myself. College life was a conglomerate of peer pressure, and studying what the professor expected, but not, necessarily, the subject. This continued into the work place. Not just who was present, but rather which supervisor, or boss was. What was expected of me as an employee, to advance my career? And so, a lifetime is spent, camouflaging myself, hiding my true self, to please others, to be accepted, to advance in the eyes of others. If it weren’t so tragic, I think it would be laughable now, to find it strange that I don’t know who I am?

All of us have layer upon layer of masks, disguises and cloaks veiling who we really are, our innermost self. We have heaped so much extraneous junk on ourselves, we have lost our own identity. We might actually now believe we are one of the many persons we throw out to others. It is time for us to ask Christ, “Who am I, Lord? Help me find myself.” We don’t like what we see, we don’t want anyone to know who we are, what we are. But Christ knows who we are, what we are, what we have become. And wonder of wonders… He loves us! In spite of ourselves, even though we don’t like who we think we are, He truly loves us and wants to be with us.

I can’t tell you, how to know who you are underneath all the layers that have piled on over the years. What could I tell you? I also am struggling with the same problem. But I DO know where to start, how to start, how to make progress. We have to first recognize that we are hidden not only from others, but ourselves, as well. And to find ourself, we have to run to Jesus, flee to Him. Lord, help me grow closer to you. Help me, be honest with you. And Lord, while I am being honest with You, in that honesty, show me who I am. Help me understand what steps I need to take to get closer to myself as I get closer to You. Would anyone like to share their thoughts?

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