I took my own advice from yesterday’s blog and went to Mass this morning. It has been a long time since I have attended a weekday Mass. Anyway, after kneeling down in the pew, before Mass, I began …absent mindedly… to recite the Act of Contrition. This is a ritual that I always do before the Mass starts. During it, my mind runs over the sins, transgressions, acts of impatience, unkindness, and all the rest of the little shop of horrors of my past life. It is like I am saying to God, “Here I am, and in case you forgot…I am the one that did these things.” Well, this morning, as I was going through my little ritual, a thought popped into my head. Why am I saying I am sorry for all of these things? I am, but I already confessed them. Some, I even confessed multiple times. Christ said, “That once a sin is confessed and forgiven in the sacrament of Reconciliation… it is FORGOTTEN by Him”.
This started me on a new line of thinking, before Mass, today. Do I think that Christ really didn’t forgive me when I confessed these sins? Do I trust Him or don’t I? If I was sorry, which I was, if I intended to not do them again, which I meant at that time (even though I might have slipped up afterwards) … then I was truly forgiven. It is over. This is not a time for moaning and groaning over milk that been spilled and wiped up? Why am I here today, right now? The Mass, the most perfect of prayers, is about to begin. Jesus’ sacrifice on the cross, his offering of himself up to his heavenly Father for our transgressions will be celebrated once again. What is my part in all of this?
We listen to readings from the Old and New Testaments. We hear about God’s love and tenderness for His people. We hear of Jesus’ life and what it means to us and our relationship with God. We hear the Word of God stream out of the Bible. These are the very words, which we heard a long time ago, and told us that Catholicism, Christianity was something special to us. Something stirred inside our heart.
And so, we hear God’s Word and try to identify some aspect of our own lives to which it has meaning. We then express our own beliefs to all present, when we recite The Creed. And then… The Offertory follows. Unfortunately, we tend to think of it as the “collection”. But it is just this, “The Offertory”, which concerns us most intimately. Without realizing its significance, we think of it as merely, “the Collection”. Believe it or not, it is actually symbolic of what the Offertory really is. We take something of our lives and place it in the hands of the celebrant, and together with the bread on the paten and the wine in the chalice is offered to God as our combined sacrifice. This is the moment of truth. This is the time we acknowledge that we need Christ’s action, but would like to offer something of our own as well, imperfect as it is.
So here I am waiting for the beginning of Mass and what am I doing? Recounting past offenses? How much better would it be to think of things positive that I can do today, or this week and offer them as my symbol of my love for Jesus. It can be my thank you to Him. People are people. They are not obstacles, they are suffering, hurting, hoping individuals. “But what can we do?” we ask. We can cry with them. We can offer our hand in friendship to them. We can see their need and help them. And, when we run out of opportunities to assist, we can always pray for them. Who in the Church around us (including ourselves) does not need our prayers? Which leaders of our government do not need our prayers, in today’s topsy-turvy world? Name one country in the world, today, that does not need divine assistance with the handling of its problems. So, there is a lot that we can do. Before Mass, we can try to assess what qualities we have and can use for others. This is a much more positive way to prepare for the divine banquet we are about to attend, than thinking of past offenses. In offering our daily lives as prayer for others, we are saying “Yes” to everything Jesus preached, here on earth. We are putting our life on the paten with the knowlege that coupled with Christ’s life, it will be pleasing to our God
Tag Archive: forgiveness
Today, is May 21, 2011. We hear and see many declarations of the world’s end. Could it end today? Certainly, it could. Could it end tomorrow? Again, we have to answer with a “yes”. It could also end a thousand years from now or any day in between. Each day has the same degree of possibility. As we hear in the Bible, “Heaven and earth shall pass away, but my word shall not pass away. But of that day or hour no man knows, neither the angels in heaven, nor the Son, but the Father. Take ye heed, watch and pray. For ye know not when the time is.” -1
Man has a fascination with the end-time. What will happen? How will it happen? What will be left? Man’s curiousity and inquisitiveness comes into play with full force, here. And yet, we should just ask ourselves, “Why do we want to know”? “Are we changing our lives for the better?” The only thing we know for sure is that time will most certainly, run out. The when should really not be important to us. What is important is what are we doing with the time available?
Let’s suppose that you did know the exact time. What would you change? Or, maybe better said, would you change? Curiousity can be just morbid, or it can prompt reform. An anticipated fearful event is NOT enough to prompt reform. Reform can only happen through our view of our lives, and our recognition of the gap between where we are and what Jesus asks of all mankind. But even then, the reform would be nothing more than a conforming to a plan laid out by someone else.
It is our relationship with Jesus, which sparks our feelings of love and affection to Him that can and will prompt the necessary reform. We cannot undo our past. We cannot remake our lives based on something that may happen in our lifetime. Our reform can only be brought about by our recognition of His love for us. His life, His teachings, and His death were all because of His love for us.
Padre Pio, in his writings-points out, “…Jesus did not measure the blood He shed for the salvation of humanity, could He possibly measure my sins in order to lose me? I do not believe so.”-2 Our awareness of the completeness of Christ’s love for us, only that is what will prompt us to change and reform our lives. His goodness and warmth that we feel and recognize will be the mechanism which will spur us to joyously follow Him. The end time is as important as what kind of washing machine we will buy next. His love is our life.
1- Mark 13,31-33
2- Secrets of a Soul, Padre Pio’s Letters to His Spiritual Directors
For some reason, prominent in my mind today is Jesus lying motionless in his tomb. The horrible events of yesterday are over. All the commotion and butchery, all the insults and pain have subsided. The coolness of the cave, probably even a little damp, seems to offer some comfort, some balm to the raw wounds of His tortured body. The deafening silence seems in awe of Him, Who is laid there.
He, who taught us every day of His life, who preached by word and example how our lives are to be lived, what does He wish to show us now, as He lies there quietly, motionless? Soon there will be the Resurrection. Soon there will be the proof that He would indeed rebuild the temple that was destroyed. But right now, as He lies there motionless, what lesson, what insight can we glean?
By dying yesterday, by willingly giving up His life, He took upon Himself all the sins of the world. Everyone’s, yours and mine, He shouldered. This is what redemption required. One sacrificial lamb, the Christ, would be offered up for the sins of mankind. By our Baptism into Christ, we acknowledge that we are sinners. And, bearing the stains of sin we needed to be washed free of the effects of our misdeeds. Regardless of when the baptism was, when we were young, or in the recent past, every day we live we acknowledge our indebtedness to Jesus.
Today, though, right now, there is no movement, no preaching, and no miracles. He lies there still, as though He is waiting for something to happen. Maybe today is for us. Maybe, today is our day to feel the pain, the sorrow, the shame, that our lives have caused. Maybe today we are to focus on where our lives are headed, to recognize that there are areas in our life that need to change. What has transpired over these two days was necessary because of mankind, us. Use this time to contemplate where your life is going. How important are these events to us? Do we really see and understand that Jesus is dying for US? His conquering evil and death is so that we shall be able to rise with Him tomorrow in glory?
After reading this, close your eyes. Picture yourself there in the small cave with the buried Jesus. It is just you and the lifeless body of Jesus. There is no noise, very little, if any, light. You have witnessed the Last Supper, the agony in the garden, the mock trial, the scourging, and the crucifixion. What do you feel? What are your thoughts? Here is a man who died for you! He suffered intensely, so that you would not. Does the direction of your life change? Does it need to change? What one thing can we do to unite ourselves completely with Jesus? What will show our total acceptance of Jesus? It is to have the same love and concern for others that Jesus has for us. Then, and only then, do we reflect Christ. Then, and only then, can we consider ourselves ready for the Resurrection.
Leaving the Last Supper, the twelve, Jesus and the remaining eleven, walked to the Garden of Gethsemane. Here, the Christ was reduced to tears and fear. His humanity was once again evident. Why a man? Why this man? Was it really necessary that He die? Is God so demanding? What would be accomplished? To answer these questions, let us step back and quickly look at what has led to this state.
Someone, (Our first ancestors, Adam and Eve), defied the will of God. Using the free will that God had given them, they chose to use it in defiance, as we do, even today. In so doing they paved the way for a weakened mankind to defy God. This action brought evil, sickness and death into the world. Throughout time this evil, this cancer grew and continues to grow and spread. To restore the balance in the universe, to restore justice, a sacrifice has to be made. What could offset the evil, the hatred, the murder, the lust, the continuing disregard of God and His Goodness, all of which built up over thousands of years? A god must suffer and die. But, then, God would not be God, if he could suffer and die. A man, a God-man, a person so perfect that He knew not sin would have to the sacrificial lamb. He would have to be the sacrifice. And so, from all eternity we have Jesus designated for the task of saving mankind from itself.
All of this defies logic. It sounds like a fairy tale. But here is where our faith must bridge the gap. A loving, caring God wants man to freely love Him and so gives him free will. That it is possible that man can choose to turn his back on God, and does, is the price of free will. We have been given a gift. How we use it is totally dependent on us.
The sad part of this is that we, all of us, have sinned. Maybe it was a slight disagreement, or a heated argument, or a murderous attack. Maybe it was stealing a nickel, or something of much greater value. Maybe it was a desire, a lust, an adulterous relationship. Small or big, our sins are added onto the heap of mankind’s willful self-serving. Restoration of order in the universe must be accomplished. If it is not restored, if it is ignored, then God could not be perfect, could not be just, could not be God.
So, here we are in Gethsemane, the apostles , asleep, Jesus, afraid and in tears. We gather our clubs and go after this Man. His agony, His scourging, His pain and torture, and ultimately His death will all take place very soon. Which of these things are we responsible for? Surely, my evil was not this huge. I am not a mass murderer, like Hitler. Mine was just a small, minor transgression. But, Jesus is suffering for ALL mankind. You and I are part of that group. Our transgressions, big and small are part of this trash heap that He is paying the price for. The pain in His muscles, the flesh being torn, the punches, the insults, the mockery, the nailing to the cross, we are responsible for these. And his response to all of this? “Father, forgive them, they don’t know what they are doing”. He makes excuses for us.
It is much easier to think of all of this as a fairy tale. It didn’t really happen, so I don’t have to be concerned about it. Let me shove it to the back regions of my mind, where my thoughts rarely go. … But it did happen. We are responsible. For us to make amends we have to honestly look at Jesus and see what He did for us and why. Realize that He did this for us. Our free will must again come into play. We must use it now to recognize our guilt, our complicity in this tragedy. With our free will, Jesus wants us to recognize and admit our guilt, accept His act of Love and freely give our love and concern to the rest of mankind. If we do this, we show our love to Him. We give back to God our love using our free will.
Did you know that a sheep’s normal vision of sight is only seeing six feet? It will eat constantly and will have its head down; all the while it is eating, or looking for food. It moves from one patch of enticing grass to another. It’s like, the sheep is thinking, “oh here’s one, and oh, look, there’s another”. It is not concerned over what the rest of the sheep are doing, or where they are going. It will continue to look for something to eat, wherever it wishes. In short it is wrapped up in its own needs and becomes oblivious to the safety or dangers around it.
Now multiply that by a hundred sheep, and you can see that the shepherd must be on his toes, all the time. He is constantly bringing the herd together, ensuring that they will all arrive home safely. No matter how good the shepherd is however, one or two will invariably find a grassy spot behind a knoll, behind a large boulder, or in a stand of trees. And once that happens, the job of the shepherd doubles in its difficulty. He must still continue to keep the herd together, but he must locate all the strays that have wandered from his sight.
Why all of this about sheep? Yesterday’s Gospel was from Luke, Chapter 15, verses 1 to 10. In it is the parable of the Good Shepherd and looking for the one that strayed. The priest mentioned the fact about the sheep’s eyesight. It made an impression on me. I thought about the impact of keeping one’s head down, while coupled with seeing very poorly. We have to agree that this is definitely something that we cannot do in a bustling community with traffic whizzing by.
And yet, sometimes we do just that. Whether we call it tunnel vision, or blind spot, one-track mind or being oblivious, the end result is the same…we don’t see, nor do we want to see any other point of view, but our own. We can talk and hear about Christ and His love for us all day. But for it to be meaningful to us, to have this change our ways, we have to put away our blinders. Our blinders are usually set up by ourselves. We have grown comfortable with them. They help us see only as much and as far as we want to see. With them we only see the problems that other people have, the value systems that we know are not right (and are thankful they are not ours). These blinders prevent us from seeing our own, self-made problems, our hampering attitudes, and worst of all, they prevent us from getting closer to Jesus.
We are oblivious to the Shepherd hunting us down. We move on from one enticing “grassy” spot to another. We are constantly searching for something that will help us get through our day, something that will satisfy our immediate needs. St. Augustine chose to word it, “Our hearts are restless, until they rest in Thee.” In short, we seek out everything that we know of, that we think will satisfy the aching, yearning in our hearts. All the while the patient Shepherd seeks us out, waiting for that moment when we throw up our hands, and earnestly cry out, “God, help me!” Then, and only then, with our free will desiring assistance, the gentle Shepherd, caresses us and places us on His shoulders and carries us back to the fold.
Flowing of Forgiveness and Love
A good friend of mine, a priest, was talking to me about growth. During this conversation, he pointed out how forgiveness of self is just as important as forgiveness of others. “Actually”, he continued, “if we don’t’ forgive ourselves, it becomes impossible to forgive others.” My head did a double take on that. A gigantic lesson was being placed in front of me, one to which I knew I had to pay attention. We spoke of many things that afternoon, but I would like to pay particular attention to this thought.
It all begins with Christ and His love and forgiveness for us. This is not just a pretty grouping of words, but rather it is the heart of Christianity. When all is said and done, the central theme of Christianity, Catholicism, all revolve around Christ. He knows who we are. He knows what we are. He knows that we don’t always accomplish the good, we desire. However, His love for us is constant, always there. Yes, we must strive to do better with our lives. Yes, we must strive to return this love to Him. But, in spite of our slips, our falls, our downright evil actions, He is constantly loving us and desiring our love in return.
So, think about this, to Jesus, what we did last night, what we want to do today…He forgives and loves us. What we did in our distant past…He forgives and loves us. He knows that once we accept His forgiveness….wait….really accept His forgiveness, feeling truly sorry for our actions, craving to become more like Him and loving Him, as He is, in us and others, then we have truly begun our journey to and with Him.
Do we know we are forgiven? Do we know that Jesus loves us? Take out the “we” and “us” and let it read, “Do I know I am forgiven?” Do I know that Jesus loves me?” Why is it so important for us to know these things? You and I are no different than ANY other person walking this earth. Think of the best in your eyes, and think of the worst in your eyes. We are all alike. There is no best and worst. We are all loved by and forgiven by Jesus. We cannot look upon others any differently than we look upon ourselves. We have all sinned. Because of us, it was necessary for Jesus to come into this world. And because of Jesus, we are all saved. What we have to do is acknowledge, accept, and embrace the love and forgiveness of Jesus.
There is one last thing that we should consider. It can be very informative to us. If we DO find fault in others, if we find it difficult to embrace others with their problems, their faults, their way of living, THEN we have not yet forgiven ourselves the way Christ wants us to forgive. We do not have to embrace other’s problems, other’s faults, other’s way of living, but the person saddled with these, we must embrace, we must forgive. Forgiveness is a willed action, not a feeling action.
Amen to ALL
(16th and last, in a series of a presentation on The Apostles Creed)
When we apply for a loan, or a promise to be responsible for the use of a car, or anything of legal importance we sign our name at the end of the document. By applying our name, our reputation so to speak, at the end we are showing our acceptance to the terms. The “Amen” that we use so often in religious prayers and actions dates back to the Old Testament. Its meaning is Yes, I believe, So be it, I accept. It is our verbal signature of what just happened, of what was just said.
We have just enumerated in the Creed all the articles of faith that a Catholic Christian believes. And just like all of the other prayers and significant actions, it too ends with an “amen”. This is not like a period at the end of a sentence. This is our TOTAL acceptance of what just happened. It is not to be taken lightly. It is our bond, our belief, it is who we are.
In keeping with this understanding, let’s take a look at the “Great Amen” within the Mass. It, too, means Yes, I believe, So be it, I accept. What then makes it great? In the Mass, the priest holds up, for all to see, the newly consecrated bread and wine, now the Body and Blood of Jesus Christ. Christ is present on our altar. The sacrifice of the cross is once more offered up for our sakes. At this moment, the priest says, “Through Him, with Him and in Him, in the unity of the Holy Spirit, all honor and glory are yours, Almighty Father, forever and ever.” The implication is indisputable. Only through Christ can honor and glory be given to God. Why are we at Mass? Because of an obligation? To see our neighbors? We are there to give honor and glory to God. We are there to join ourselves, our lives to Christ through love. In this unity with Jesus, we sanctify our actions that we do for others, we make holy the sufferings and anxieties that we experience and willingly accept. Our lives and everything that they entail, we humbly associate with Christ. So that together with Christ, we can give our measure of honor and glory to God, as well. AMEN. AMEN. AMEN.
